Tuesday, January 11, 2011

Who NNOSE The Meaning Of The Internet?

Like so many posts that start life as a light-hearted hiatus - a custard cream of a post, if you like - yesterdays' little excursion into the work of Hans Pillinger (1889-1955) raised a number of very important issues and may yet have brought about a major breakthrough in understanding the question that has been troubling so many people for the last decade : what on earth is the purpose of the Internet? I have been overwhelmed with the number of responses from people who believe that I have somehow - somewhat unintentionally but nevertheless serendipitously - focused the limelight of critical analysis on a problem that has so long tortured men's souls : what to do with orphaned socks.

NNOSE No. 1 : Black with multi-coloured narrow stripes
I have therefore established a new organisation which will be known as NNOSE (News From Nowhere Orphan Sock Exchange) and which henceforth will be dedicated to reuniting orphaned socks, wherever they may be. This truly global initiative requires nothing more than for you to post a weekly scan of any orphaned sock in your collection and agree to post it off to any other member of the NNOSE Network who has a similar available orphan. I urge all my friends and followers to post (digitally) a sock in the hope that soon they will be able to post (logistically) the same sock to a grieving partner. The movement could become viral within a matter of weeks. At long last a real reason for the Internet will have been discovered. Mankind will be a happier, more balanced, warmer, and smarter species. If you would like to lay a claim to my NNOSE No 1, all you need do is post a picture of a similar sock (for the sake of veracity, in a different pose please) along with your mailing address and my orphan will be winging its way to you. Twitter and Facebook campaigns are in the process of being designed along with a suitable logo which will enable you to proudly show all your friends that you are a member of the NNOSE Network. Watch this space (or should that be smell this space) for further updates.
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On a slightly different subject I was fascinated to notice that Hans Pallinger (1889 - 1955) had made an appearance on at least one listing of famous twentieth century artists within a couple of hours of my post going up yesterday.

23 comments:

  1. What a great idea! I, of course, just wear mismatched socks but now I don't have to.

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  2. Heh. Rather a good idea, I'd say. I'm shuttering IrreX2 on the 13th, but I'll try to work a sock into the remaining schedule.

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  3. Would they accept socks of a holy order?

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  4. Hmmmmm... I have doubts as to the success of your venture. The late, great Douglas Adams speculated that the reason for the constant disappearance of ballpoint pens was that the pens were slipping through a wormhole to a planet where ballpoint pens were the dominant life-form. I believe that the same is true for all those missing socks. The only way those orphans will be reunited with their mates is if they, too, slip through the wormhole and join their sole-mates in a world where socks are the Center of the Universe. I fear your well-meant attempt at digital reunification is doomed to failure.

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  5. I do believe that you have hit on the fundamental purpose of the technological revolution of the 21st Century.

    Just for clarification to my comment of yesterday though, younger teen is currently wearing one black sock with purple toe and heel stripes, accompanied by one black sock with pale blue toe and heel stripes. This is normal!

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  6. Hate to be a party pooper, Alan, but I tend to match mine as closely as possible. After that, I just wear odd socks. I have caught people looking, before, but no one has ever mentioned the mis-match. Will this bring the internet down?

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  7. Hilarious! But on a more serious note I think this also gives blogging a very real purpose.

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  8. This gets better! I tend to subscribe to Roy's theory that odd socks disappear into another time dimension (or perhaps into the workings of my washing machine... is that why the old one blew up recently?) But I'm going to give NNOSE a go.

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  9. Count me in! The Mister would be very happy if I could reunite his favorite sock to a closely matched new mate! :) I shall post it this evening. NNOSE...haha...you are brilliant!

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  10. I'd donate them to a puppet master.

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  11. Only one sock? That doesn't help me at all but it's inspired me to post. I'll link back. It's a boy thing by the way. I am in possession of all my socks, perhaps not all my marbles but definitely all my socks.

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  12. Say, Alan...that's a particularly handsome sock you have there. I think you need to be careful of scammers though (another internet problem.) For instance, I may want your sock so badly that I pretend to have another one just to convince you to part with it.

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  13. You're right! This could definitely go viral.
    Funnily enough, I just did some laundry at my mom's the other day and left a load in her dryer. Kevin picked it up for me on the way home from work the next day and my mom was in a tizzy because she could only find one of purple striped socks!

    I will post a photo and tell the world of NNOSE forthwith.

    Kat

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  14. Check this out Alan: http://hyggedigter.blogspot.com/2011/01/sock-it-to-me-nnose-see-below-for.html

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  15. I am such a bah humbug. My hubby buys the exact same socks every time. When one wears out, it gets tossed and when the pile of socks gets low we buy some more. And on it goes.

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  16. OK dear Alan. I've posted my 'sock post' :)

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  17. I never have that problem, thanks to the fact that my wardrobe is predominantly black. Even when the overall style is somewhat different, no one notices. Having said that, this is a remarkable idea nonetheless!

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  18. I keep my orphans in a clothes-pegged bag next to my dryer. They look at me longingly every time I do the washing. You're a great humanitarian, Alan ... or a sockatarian, that is.

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  19. Anyone got a pale blue one? See here for further details.

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  20. By George, you've got it. What a good idea. Eberle & I have a few candidates we may need to submit. Tho Roy's idea is pretty intriguing, too.

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  21. Could your expand your order to gloves...and shoes...? We have several mismatched leathers.

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  22. What a brilliant idea. I have a full bushel basket of orphans going back forty years that are grieving their lost mate.

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