(I had to wait five weeks for the switch-on of my cochlear implant so you can wait a few days for the next part of the story. In the meantime, a moan)
I know I am old not because I forget things or take more time doing the simplest of things. I know I am old not by the fact that when I have to bend down to tie my shoe-lace I try to think if there is anything else needs doing whilst I am down there. No, I know I am old because I have become ceaselessly grumpy. I cannot watch television without shouting words like "ridiculous" or "get a life". I cannot enjoy a quiet pint without wanting to pull the plug out of the adjacent music tv projector. I cannot walk the dog without wanting to write angry letters to the Council. If I send the letters they get me nowhere - there is probably a file with my name written on it - so today I will post my angry letter to the world instead.
You will be aware that several months ago a bevy of Council workers started fitting banners to the lamp-posts on the main roads leading into town. These banners are situated some thirty or forty feet above street level and therefore are almost impossible to see from a passing car. If examined in detail - with the aid of either a long step-ladder or a long focal length camera lens - they reveal messages such as "Summer Buzz in Libraries"
I would appreciate it if someone could explain to me what on earth is the point of these ridiculous pieces of plastic. I assume they cost a considerable amount of money. They convey no useful or indeed no literate message. As they don't advertise any third party service they obviously bring in no revenue. And they get in the way of the bloody sky!
Does nobody in the Town Hall sit down and work out whether the latest silly idea is of any worth or value. Does nobody try to calculate whether a scheme provides any value added to the poor citizens of the town such as myself. Has anyone ever tried to calculate whether such plastic monstrosities have ever caused one additional pair of feet to cross the threshold of the local library. What possible use are such things other than to a passing giraffe?
Yours, in exasperation,
A Burnett, Council Tax Payer from Fixby.